It's highly likely that by now (45 days later) your new year's resolutions are at best a struggle and at worst a fading memory. You are not alone. That's what human beings do. We make some change, then fall off the wagon. We make some change, then fall off the wagon. How predictable. How annoying! Problem is we live in a throw-away culture. It's easier for us to toss in the towel than to put our heads down and persist.
What a gift we give ourselves when we learn to "stay." Stay with our gut, stay with the dream, stay when it's hard, stay when we're tired, stay when we hear some vague message about our foolheartedness. My eternal optimist can't evade Frank Sinatra's distant voice, "Pick yourself up, brush yourself off, and start all over again."
I am able to make change when I pick myself up, lick my wounds and try again. The more I persist, the closer I come. It's a lot like work. Sigh.